I can handle the gifts. I can handle the food prep. I can handle the cheer and the joy. What I can’t handle is all the people. Though you’d never guess it, I am an introvert. Yes, I did 90% of my shopping online because I hate malls. Sue me. While that alone is a topic for another post, I can assure you that I am not a Scrooge and I do in fact like (most) people.. Christmas is my favorite time of year because when I was living abroad it was the only time my parents, sister and I were in the same place, and I could eat + sleep for 4 days straight with little to no judgement. It’s just the energy I need to do all of the interacting is a lot more than most. And the recovery time. I’m really good one-on-one, or even in groups of three or less. Once we get higher than four people I start to feel like a Dementor is sucking my soul out of me. (Harry Potter reference for the non-nerds.) So for that reason, the holidays can be super tough. Though avoiding people and hibernating for a week with a cup of BP coffee and season 1-2 of Supernatural sounds super appealing, it’s not realistic. So, with that in mind, if you HAVE to go out and be joyous, here are few tips to help get you through the holidays.
The Introvert’s Guide to Surviving the Holidays
1. Maintain Personal Space
It’s important to never let someone come within in 3 ft of your body so as to maintain your personal space and not suck the life right out of you. Think about it, you can’t really get into a deep conversation with someone when you’re over an arms-length away. Better yet, if you can put food or a punch bowl in between you, you will save yourself from awkward handshakes and over-huggers. I also don’t see anything wrong with having a very enlightening texting conversation with someone in another room at the same function.
Success Tip: Brush up on your .gifs and memes beforehand and save a few to your phone for emergency use.
2. Utilize Small Children
Alternatively, if you occupy yourself with a small child (a baby would be even better) people will, for the most part, leave you alone. It’s the classic, “Oh sorry, kinda busy right now. But next year I’d LOVE to hear about your ant farming business.”
You’ll be giving some parents a break, and though kids do take a lot of energy to watch, it’s a totally different energy than a 50-year-old drunk uncle.
(Editors note: why I choose “ant farming” for this example is beyond me. No offense is meant to the hardworking and reputable ant farmers of the world.)
Success Tip: Make sure to let people ask all pertinent questions to the actual parents before you hold the child, otherwise those same people will flock to you which totally defeats the purpose.
3. Prep Yo Self Before You Wreck Yo Self (with small talk)
Christmas is a time of year where you are catching up with so many people that you inevitably tell the same damn stories in every interaction. Ugh. That is just too much peopleing for me.
I’ve had this brilliant idea for the last few years to make small talk prep cards for gatherings where you have to interact with more than 3 people. This is something that I’m pretty sure would make me rich (so no stealing!) and I need to make this a reality ASAP. Mine would look something like this:
Married, no kids yet. Only a year, yes it goes by fast. No, it wasn’t tough. Yes, we still like each other. I work in digital marketing. No, no-one really knows what means. More wine, please.
Success Tip: Make sure to hand out before people initiate a conversation with you.
4. Devise a Safe-Word
It’s important to have a safe-word so your partner will know when it’s time for you to leave. And by time to leave, I don’t mean get ready to leave, I mean exit immediately. I personally like the word “tangerine” because it has a nice ring to it, and it’s not often that you would use that in a sentence, especially during the holidays. It’s different enough for my husband to pick up quick, but not too weird that people will catch on to your bailing.
Success Tip: Select a word that you can say with a straight face. Laughter will ruin you!
5. Just Say No
This may seem like a foreign idea to most, but trust me – it’s a winner. Did you get invited to an event with people you don’t really like? Or maybe it’s some family members you’ve already seen 3 times and there is not much left to talk about (see #3 re: ant farm). Perhaps it’s something you actually really want to do (weird), but the stress of making it a reality based on location or timing of other events is just too much to handle. In these cases you have, believe it or not, the right to say, “No.” Crazy, right? Say it out loud a few times and feel how liberating that sounds.
Success Tip: Don’t give an excuse. Most people will be too caught off guard to ask for one.
I know there are some events that this just doesn’t work for which leads me to…
6. All of the Coffee
Oh, sweet baby Jesus, if coffee isn’t the best gift of the season for an introvert, I don’t know what is. Specifically, this new fancy coffee I’ve been drinking that gets me up and running like no other and truly helps me not only to survive but to #elevatetheseasonI love me my daily coffee and usually drink 2 or 3 during a day. One to get me going, two because my first one got cold and I reheated it 5 times or until it was no longer drinkable, and three in the early afternoon because I’ve crashed so hard from the first two.
But guess what? I’ve swapped out my regular pod coffee for some witchcraft known as Bulletproof Coffee.
WHAT. A. DIFFERENCE. First off, my three cups a day is no longer a thing. I have one cup mid-morning, and that’s it. Not only am I buzzing like a busy little bee, I’m actually getting s*** done. Hello, productivity.
Bulletproof Coffee is made by adding Brain Octane (a high-grade extract of coconut oil that improves your brain function and supports ketosis – which is when your body burns energy from fat) and Unsalted Grass Fed Butter (which is loaded with healthy fats and essential vitamins and nutrients like omega-3s, Vitamin K, D and E) to a serving of brewed Upgraded Coffee. You can find more science-y info on all of that here. When you blend them all together you get a frothy looking delicious bowl cup of caffeinated glory.
I never really thought about what was in my coffee before learning about BP, but science shows that we are drinking moldy, toxic beans – barf. No, thank you. Now that I have my clean BP coffee, the difference is clear in taste and performance. Yes, I just used the word “performance” to describe my coffee. My performance level is also off the charts after drinking this. Start small with the Brain Octane and Unsalted Grass Fed butter and build up the amount slowly otherwise you will be spending some quality time with a porcelain throne if you know what I mean. (You do know what I mean, right.)
Success Tip: Whip up a BP Coffee for yourself a few hours before making plans or attending an event and watch your interest and energy levels soar!
What are your secrets for surviving all the holiday peopleing? How do you #elevatetheseason? Is BP Coffee on your shopping list now? (It should be… #nopressure) Let me know in the comments!
Disclaimer: This post was sponsored by Bulletproof but I actually happen to really love the product, so I’d probably write about it anyway, but in this case, I get to be a brand ambassador. So, yay! My opinions are mine and mine alone, but I just thought you should know.